Its been a while.
Hello readers, if you happened to stop by my humble crazyspace. Hope this finds you in good health.
I have the words in my head but it might take a while to bring it all here.
Maybe i won't bring it all here. But a snippet. That would seem more appropriate i suppose.
In case you've been hit by amnesia, let me introduce myself.
Hello . I'm Nadia Nicole Abd Halim. You can call me Nadia, or Nicole, whichever is easier to remember.
I'm currently pursuing a Bachelor's degree in Biotechnology, with a major in Microbiology in UQ, Australia. In case you want a more honest perspective of how i see the world , click here. That's an average morning in my head. I could be thinking of lots of things and be completely silent at the same time. You never know ;)
To start off,
I am the quiet girl with a bad posture who loves her alone time. I'd love to think that I am simple and one easy person to please, sadly enough I am not. I demand so many things in life, sometimes I think someone should shake me hard. I make an effort on those tiny trivial things that makes life move and heave and rattle. I am self-deprecating but I try convincing myself that I am only human. I complicate simple things because I like to think that I’ve worked harder than everyone else and I truly deserve an ice cream.
Michael Buble, Adele, Sean Ghazi, Joss Stone, occasionally David Guetta, and mainly jazz singers make me sing when i'm on my own. I love finding good books that make me jump up and down with delight. I dream of becoming as exotic as Audrey Hepburn someday. Shopping is yoga to me. Blogging is pilates. And yes, I secretly wish i could live in the '60s where everything was so indescribably proper and polished and pristine. Where dance halls were commonplace, and so was etiquette. The perfumes, the hairstyles, the clothes; i wonder what they were like. I wonder what its like to have to learn how to Joget or ChaCha in order to have a decent social life.
Unlike today where everything is all about bumping and grinding (have you no class? poor you.)
When it comes to reading and studying, I’d prefer to have one solid area and that would simply be my study table (okay it is the only table in that area, so to sound smart I’ll just say it’s my “study table”).
But ergh, heaven knows that my head screams in horror and I’ll be pulling my hair out like a mad lady when some neighbours not too far off occasionally have their wild parties. It’s like a concert of their own. You see I detest change. Detest might be a strong word to use, but I do hate the hassle of changing my routine.
Then again, don’t get me wrong, I am not admitting I am boring and predictable either. When I am fixed on the idea, I stick by it and I don’t make a point to even try to be flexible. Same goes with my study table.
I can only read and study on it, and nowhere else-PERIOD!
I’ve always have this mythical idea that my brain absorbs facts better when I am sitting straight up, like is in its right position ; and if I were to lie down, nothing can ever go in and I would eventually just doze off.
Even back in high school, I’d end up doing my homework at home and those free times at school would just be wasted on gossips and pranks on my classmates. Oh yes, I am the one with the pranks back then. Good old days.
I find solitude when everyone else is far away in dreamland and the world falls into silent mode. I love reading and studying in the wee hours. When it’s just me and the dark; inky black sky, and occasionally the moon would be staring over. It is something that I have developed since I was in high school. It’s the perfect hours for me.
Weird as it is, I sometimes would purposely wait for my housemates to go to sleep and then only start reading- a habit I should try correcting. Talk about bad time management! But hey, everyone has a way of their own, and mine happens to be a tad eccentric. Don’t you think?
If it was for an exam, a really important one for that matter, I can go on and on and on and not even stopping to catch my breath. My record was 10 hours.
Absurd you’d say, non non mon ami, this is fact!
It was back in those SPM days, and I was a crack head. One dirty little secret; sometimes even I go on not bathing. To me , i thought it was a waste of time, and I was trying to buy as much time as possible, if only there were 48 hours in a day. Time was never enough. It was ridiculous back then, also about the same time I developed a back problem as a result of sitting down too long. This pain of mine, it still comes and goes, and whenever it strikes, I’ll be ranting about it like an old lady ; but oh it just aches terribly.
Now I usually limit myself to at least 2 or 3 hours of reading then I’ll stop to get some fresh air and even sometimes a short nap just so the brain gets a little rest. I just realized after some time , that there is no point doing harm to the body. I used to think if I am feeling that much of an ache, I must be studying hard enough to guarantee me a decent result.
Again, a very wrong concept, the naïve Nadia Nicole used to have. It’s all about doing it smartly.
When it comes to assignments, I try my best to complete as much as I can. It actually pretty much depends on how long one assignment would take me to finish. Some are extra hard, so I’d spend more time on it, leaving me less time for everything else.
On average, I would say I try working on 2 to 3 assignments.
My system is that I complete a certain task and then move on to the next one. I’m not quite fond of the idea of doing things half way through or touching bits and pieces here and there. It’s like eating an ice cream and leaving the cone out. I feel at ease knowing that, I have successfully completed one, and would enjoy the satisfaction of it
before delving into another.
As for rewards, ah.
Rewards- the one word I love apart from photography, holidays and Vienna! Again it depends. If I had been struggling with exams and studied intensely for the week, the perfect reward would probably be good results, having something out from what I’ve been working really hard on. It is as if, all the effort was worthwhile.
Having sometime to myself just to unwind, like right now; or probably a relaxed evening by the beach with my close friends where we would be talking about random things and
then laughing our heads off or doing something really silly that just lifts my spirit would be a reward on its own.
Just genuinely having a great time in the comfort of people that you have find a certain attachment to, or where you can afford to be stupid, or do things that only a crackhead would do and still not look funny is more than enough for me.
I am admitting that I am one materialistic person, I love physical things, but there are
things in life that are worth more than money can ever buy. Those are the ones I call real rewards and it gets me pondering, these are the times that we live for, the one that reminds us to always be grateful to God for His blessings.
You know what they say, an achievement is nothing if there is no one to share it with.
(P/S: A shopping spree wouldn’t be too bad of a reward either , :p )
I'd say this has been one of the best self-analyses I've ever done.
A mind on fire melts the soul, always and all ways.
She was the type to like things that were concrete, like the ocean. Something you could point to and know what it is. I think that’s why she always struggled with God. And I think that’s why she also struggled with love. She couldn’t touch it. She couldn’t hold on to it and make sure it never changed. But sometimes it’s those things you can’t touch that you need to hold on to the most.